Ok, sorry I am on a roll. At our old school, we had everything "institutionalized" and great support from the principal once we got him on board and educated on FA. He had the monitors check the kiddo's lunchboxes (who were sitting at the nut-free table) for PB&Js/trail mix, granolas, etc. It was just a quick check. Kids were aware and supportive and didn't seem to mind. This was 1st grade. Many had known about the allergy from kindergarten. One mom even started buying soybutter and sending that with a note in her daughter's lunch. Awesome. Made my son feel so good. Anyway....we didn't want to leave.
When I was going over lunch seating with the nurse at new school, she said she felt it was like policing their lunches and that the kids wouldn't like it nor their parents. I said, well he's not going to sit by himself at a little table and we need to know if someone is sitting next to him with PB/nuts at lunch. It just can't be. Their lunch boxes touch, etc. Young kids are messy. Things fall. Benches are touched. She said well, anyone could just walk by the end of the table anyway with it on their hand and inadvertantly touch the table or his lunch box, etc. I said, true, but why invite it right next to him on a daily basis. What is your opinion?
Sorry, I will pipe in my opinion on this one too (I'm on a roll too).
I don't think it will bother the kids or the parents as long as it is done in the right way. A lunch aide visually screening the lunches at your child's table should not be a problem, and isn't that big of a deal. Yes, it IS "policing" and I feel is necessary for kids who will be seated next to your child. We have the lunch aide come by while the kids are just sitting down and just look at what everyone is eating, from hot lunch to cold lunch. Then she will just make her rounds and make sure to come by periodically to make sure nothing else has appeared at the table. If the administration doesn't make a BIG deal of the "policing" then the kids and parents won't think it is a big deal either. Just my opinion. And if the kids ask, which they will, having the aide nicely explain that kids with allergies can't be too close to what they are allergic to, so she is just checking to be sure everyone is safe while eating their lunches. No biggie.